Hello everybody,
One of the most important things we learn in self-help is that we are not our thoughts.
That while it may seem like our minds are in charge, know exactly what they’re doing and should be listened to at all times, a lot of the time they are running on autopilot and basing their decisions on old stories and outdated habits that don’t serve the latest versions of us very well at all.
The good news, is that once we realise this, and can start treating our thoughts as ‘suggestions’ vs ‘commands’, we are able to start consciously redirecting them in ways that DO serve us and can make us healthier and happier.
There are many MANY books about this topic, a couple of my favourites being; The Untethered Soul by Michael A Singer (spiritual), You Are Not Your Thoughts by Frances Trussell (entry level mindfulness) and Mindset by Carol Dweck (a classic on changing the way you think).
And while I have read all of these books (and more) on this topic, and am currently immersed in several Law of Attraction texts telling me that I have the power to redirect my thoughts (and that changing my thoughts is, in fact, the only way I will ever change anything) I still find it VERY HARD to do in practice.
I know I’m not alone.
Which is why I’m thrilled that today’s mini masterclass from Substack psychotherapist - and Bristol-based Shelfie, - features a super simple ACT-based technique for getting a handle on negative thoughts that is perfect for self-helpers of all levels.
ABOUT ACT (Acceptance Commitment Therapy)
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is a type of mental health therapy that helps you acknowledge your relationship with your thoughts and feelings. You learn to understand your feelings instead of changing them. You'll work on reframing your values and adjusting your behaviors to better match them.
source: ClevelandClinic.org)
ACT is a way to increase our mental well-being by creating distance between ourselves and our thoughts, and the exercise that Natasha shares in the video above - Name That Story - is a great place to start.
Natasha says: “This is an exercise I use in my work as a psychotherapist, designed to help you *notice* your thoughts, create space from them, and take action towards the person you want to be, regardless of the story.”
I invite (urge!) you to carve out 5 minutes today to give it a go.
You can find out more about ACT as a therapy HERE.
ABOUT OUR EXPERT: NATASHA SCULLANE
Natasha, who hosts the Therapreneur Diaries here on Substack and has 10 years experience of working as a psychotherapist, launched a private online therapy practice in 2023 after spending 15+ years working in the NHS.
Of her Substack publication she says: “I write for confident-looking women who struggle with self-doubt. Life looks good from the outside, but something feels missing or stuck. I want my readers to know they can trust themselves, they can gain clarity about what really matters, and they can take confident action towards a life which feels 100% aligned to them.”
And of her relationship with herself today, Natasha says: “I have a positive relationship with myself. I know I am a valuable person and I trust my gut. I mess up sometimes, but I am compassionate to myself about it; I'm only human, and I'm doing my best. I've got here through going to therapy, reading self-help books and applying techniques which resonate with me. I am guided 100% by my values. Knowing what my top 5 core values are provides me with valuable guidance about my mindset and my actions. A negative track of mine might start playing, or doubts might creep in, but I know I can take steps anytime towards the person I want to be and the meaningful life I want to live. Living in alignment with my values has massively improved my relationship with myself. I've built solid self-trust, and I feel calm and in sync (most of the time!).”
Natasha has also shared a couple of her favourite books to recommend, including:
The Reality Slap by Russ Harris (thegodfather of ACT)
FIND OUT MORE:
You can find out more about Natasha’s therapy work and writing by subscribing to her Substack publication.
She also offers a guide to navigating self-doubt that is totally FREE to download.
Enjoy the workshop. Let us know how it works for you (as a guest author Natasha is co-author on this feature so you can share any notes or questions you have for her in the Comments).
And if you’re an expert Shelfie/author/friend of the Club and would like to share a mini masterclass with our community then please get in touch by RSVP (our next theme will be healing so anything along those lines would be especially marvellous).
Toni 💛
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