How to beat the 'new year, new me' overwhelm (+ your invite to our mental health MOT event)
Surprising January advice from a self-help evangelist + what's happening at the Shelf Help Club this month
Hello everybody,
Welcome to the first Monday and the first full week of the new year. Possibly your first real day back in the office/inbox/real life?
And how are you feeling about all that realness?
Judging by everything I'm reading/seeing/hearing at the moment, lots of you are already O.V.E.R. the 'new year new me' vibe.
In fact, this year I'm sensing a real backlash to the idea of making any kind of change to our lives/selves as we kick off a shiny new year.
And so today I want to share a strategy to make this 'new year, same old me' attitude work for your future best self, and also… a confession.
First up, my confession. This weekend I received my once-upon-a-time-much-anticipated copy of Gabby Bernstein's new book, Self Help, and the feeling was an underwhelming 'meh'.
Which I think we all know isn't really me.
It definitely wasn't me when I pre-ordered it in much excitement months ago. Or watched Gabby speak about it at the Happy Place festival in the summer. Or attended her online masterclass that came as a gift with the pre-order.
And it won't be me when I pick it up again in a couple of weeks.
But right now I can't seem to find the energy to get excited about the self-help book event of the season. And if I'm feeling the self-help fatigue I know I'm not alone.
The good news? I (we) don't need to rush into anything.
2025 will be here all year.
When I look back on previous years it's been much of the same. I really love the reflective energy of the end of a year, and inspired by slow starters like coaches,
(check out her recent SLOWanuary post, below) and (loving her 1% Wellness Notes), I've very much enjoyed letting that energy linger into the following January, using the first few weeks to get a handle on where I'm at and what I really want to do/feel/be in the upcoming year.
And so, I have a surprising self-help strategy for you this week: Don't Sweat It.
That's right. The #1 piece of January advice from a serial promoter of self-help is not to panic and race into change and do all of the things.
Instead, I want us to all calm down and take our time to feel our way into the new year and what we want it to look and feel like.
If you're reading this you probably are interested in changing up/improving some areas of your life in 2025. But we didn't all wake up on January 1st as different people with new, improved energy levels.
In fact, most of us probably woke up with LESS energy than before Christmas and New Year, so let's not expect too much of ourselves right from the off and instead make a conscious decision to not let ourselves get overwhelmed with the new year/new me chat.
Let’s pause. Take a breath. Take a few more. In the words of my business mentor,
, ‘We have time, so much time.’ And in the words of this week's Bibliotherapists podcast guest, ; ‘It’s out with toxic productivity, in with gentle unfolding.’
Yes, I've announced The Miracle Morning as our next book club read, but we don't start the official read-along until Mon 13th Jan, so you have another week to get a copy/join the club/have non-miracle mornings. 😆
And to support our ease into the new year and a new improved us (because that can/will happen, just not right now) TONIGHT I’m hosting a no prep, no reading, no homework required online Self-Health check-up for ALL of our subscribers.
This session will be a kind of mental health MOT (for non-UK readers, MOT stands for Ministry of Transport and it’s an annual check-up that all cars need to undergo to make sure they’re roadworthy. And if we need to take proactive checks on our cars to keep them running smoothly, doesn’t it make sense that we should also be doing this for ourselves?!).
My new year’s wish is ultimate Self health for all of you. And I define Self Health as: a state of overall mental well-being that enables us to manage and enjoy life from a place of calm and resilience. This mental wellness comes from being in balance across five key areas including; Social Health, Physical Health, Intellectual Health, Emotional Health and Spiritual Health.
SELF HEALTH: A state of overall mental well-being that enables us to manage and enjoy life from a place of calm and resilience. A result of being in balance across five key areas including; Social Health, Physical Health, Intellectual Health, Emotional Health and Spiritual Health.
And tonight is an opportunity to check-in with your Self as a way to make conscious decisions on where to focus your resources for the rest of the year.
Joining info below (open to free as well as Paid Subscribers), and completion of the Past Year Review exercise I shared recently is encouraged but not essential.
I’ve also shared our January Events Schedule here for your ref (fyi newbies, our online events generally happen on Monday evenings at 7pm UK time).
I hope I get to see/meet you online tonight.
And, as ever, in between these weekly events I also invite you to stay in touch with me and each other via our community Chat or here in the Comments.
Happy New Year from Norfolk…
Toni 💛
AT A GLANCE DATES FOR YOUR DIARY: JANUARY 2025
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Monday 6th: A Self Health Workshop (all invited)
A mental health MOT to help you get a handle on how you're feeling about life as we head into the new year. Open to all.
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Monday 13th: Read-along launch event with The Miracle Morning author, Hal Elrod
A very exciting live author event with the brilliant and inspiring Hal Elrod, who’ll be joining us to kick off our Read-along, share his story and introduce his (life) S.A.V.E.R.S. habit system. Do not miss.
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Monday 20: The Miracle Morning Movie Watch Party
Movie to support our BOTM, to be accessed by you from home - available for free on YouTube - and watched/ discussed together in the SHC Chat Box.
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Monday 27th: January Book Club
Our monthly Book Club meet to share insights and aha moments from our latest BOTM. Features small breakout groups. Not recorded.
All events are 7pm UK time. Your world time convertor is here.
Some other dates/fun stuff to highlight:
2 x new episodes from our chart-topping podcast, The Bibliotherapists to come, including: Women are Mad (Jan 10th) and Emma Gannon (Jan 17th).
💫 TONIGHT’S JOINING INFO & THIS WEEK’S READING TARGETS
💻 ZOOM JOINING LINK
Join us in the Shelf Help Zoom room at 7pm. This event will be not be recorded and will feature a small breakout.
🎯 THIS WEEK’S READING TARGET
No targets yet. There’s still time to get the book/join the club. We start reading w/c Mon 13th January.
Happy Belated New Year to all in this community! Especially you, Toni, and the wonderful team that make Shelf Help happen. You are amazing and I thank you for putting your energies into providing such a lovely place of self-discovery and improvement for us.
Oh Toni, thank you! 😘